Rayve
I'm an intelligent, independent, and strong-willed woman. The
majority of my colleagues find me argumentative. I beg to differ.
Disagreeing with the herd mindset is not the same as being argumentative, no
matter how frequently it occurs.
I am currently working towards my PhD in biochemistry. You'd think
this would be a bastion of strong independent women. Instead I'm
surrounded by the stupid, the submissive, those who are only here until
they find husbands, and those who are obsessed with breeding. Surely when
we have visiting faculty, people can ask better questions than, "When's the best
time to have a baby?"
I'm so sick of hearing about opportunities people give up because they
can't stand to be away from their girlfriend/boyfriend/spouse. If it was
truly a good relationship, the other party wouldn't allow their partner to be
held back. Even now that I've started my job hunt, I can't
sympathise. My boyfriend and I are already 1,000 miles apart. This
won't be changing any time soon but you don't hear me Bitching about it,
describing every detail of our next sexual encounter, or writing sappy letters
when I'm supposed to be paying attention to the seminar. I am guilty of
doing kakuro puzzles during seminars, but I consider that to be
productive. There is only one position that I've applied for that's near
his current location. As far as I'm concerned, income vs. cost of living
and advancement potential take priority over proximity to boything. As
soon as I get an offer, I'm on the next plane to it. No outside
consideration or permission needed.
Which brings me to the topic of marriage in general. I hate clingy
and co-dependent couples. It's not cute that you have to check in all the
time, it's pathetic. I don't understand why it's a good thing to hide
money from your spouse "just in case", but a travesty to not take his
name. I have an identity. Why should I have to become Mrs. Hisname,
have all my cards and certificates reissued, and lose any publications under my
"maiden name"? At this point in my life, I'm not going to commit myself to
anybody. As far as I'm concerned, marriage revolves around trust. If
you can't trust a person to manage money in a way that's compatible with your
view of money management, you shouldn't be marrying them. If you're
concerned about being left with nothing, either live in a joint property state
and/or write up a prenuptual agreement.
I don't need to be in a relationship to feel validated. I found the
dating scene to be so worthless that I gave it up for four years. My
current partner and I are together because he seemed intelligent and I
eventually admired his persistence despite being told I was asexual, robosexual,
working on being a crazy cat lady, and never got out of the lab anyway.
Actually the distance is great because it allows for plenty of personal
space.
I've also chosen to adopt the childfree lifestyle. While that alone
doesn't make one a Heartless Bitch, I have noticed a correlation. I have a
2.5 year old cat who was better behaved on a cross-country flight than most of
the children I've had the displeasure of sharing a cabin with. She is as
dependent a life form as I want. I don't get out often, but I enjoy going
to nice restaurants when I do. I also love traveling, usually with little
notice that I'm doing so. I'd prefer not to wonder how many hours I can
drive before the brood needs to be fed, toileted, etc. Nor do I want to
have to pack that many suitcases. A goal of mine is to drive a
911. I figure with the money saved from not having a kid, I ought to be
able to own one in the next fifteen years. Not having a kid might be
selfish and Heartless, but having one because it's "the thing to do" is
irresponsible and stupid.
In conclusion, I'm not sure I'd say that I am a Heartless Bitch. I
have plenty of heart, I simply choose to apply it where I see fit rather than
where society tells me I should.
Country: United States
Yes! I want to read more from Real Life Heartless Bitches
|
