This Week's Real-Life Heartless Bitches:
(For the week of October 4, 1998)
Heartless Hall of Fame: Women who personify the True Spirit of HBI
Debra - "Is your stupidity learned or genetic?"
Mary - "You paint your head/Your mind is dead/You don't even know what I just said/That's you, American Womanhood!" -Frank Zappa
Donna - "Either speed up our get the FUCK out of my way!"
Jodie - "Life is a coin you can spend but once. Be careful lest you let others spend it for you."
Kathy - "Only someone with a dick would say something that stupid!"
Lois - "Male bashing is the woman's network that Male bonding created!"
Cath - "Keep your zipper zipped and your mind out of my bedroom and we'll get along just fine !"
Jamie - "Blow me."
Tammy - "Scientists have finally discovered how to get the work of 5 men done----give it to a woman."
Spiritbikr - "I ride my own Harley, honey. I am not a dumb fuck, I am a smart one!"
Catherine - "Chess is a metaphor for life - the queen is the strongest and the king hides behind the pawns."
Zrinka - "Are you anxiously awaiting some complimentary brain cells from "Above" or is it just your regular stupid face?"
Deb - "If natural selection really worked, the assholes would be extinct by now."
Hazel - "I love men... cleaning my toilet!"
Autumn - "It should be a happy marriage-they are both so much in love with him."
Demetra - "It's easier to ask for forgiveness than it is to beg for permission."
Kii - "Tell me what sort of CRACK you're smoking so I can see the world the way you do."
Cheryl - "Penis envy? Oh sure, I'd love to exchange multiple orgasms for the ability to pee standing up!"
Terri - "It's my Ball and my Park, you play by My Rules, or GO HOME!"
Valerie - "I care about people, but you obviously don't fall into that category."
Zero - "If ignorance is Bliss, Your life must be a FUCKING Disneyland."
Julie-anne - "Screw the world, don't ask me for shit, everything you get you gotta work hard for it..."
Ishtar - ""I am not a pretty girl; that is not what I do. I ain't no damsel in distress; I don't need to be rescued."-Ani DiFranco"
Becca - "PMS, like life, is what you make it."
Sarah - "Sorry honey, the life shop is that way."
Marilyn - "You come one step closer sweetheart, and my boots will show you just HOW bad your dick tastes."
Paola - "I'm so into my nerdhood, you can't even mock me for it."
Anna - "Don't judge me and I won't disappoint you."
Teresa - "People who "need" people... need therapy MUCH worse!"
Flo - "Don't whine, its not dignified...and it pisses me off!"
Patricia - "(To either gender) Yes, imagining you as a breeder provides a synopsis of 'tragedy'."
Mindy - "Yes we have met before, I am the receptionist at the VD clinic."
Trudy - "If you step on my toes, I will most certainly climb over the top of you and happily stomp on your silly self!"
Susan - "It's NOT "all good"."
Braettie - "I don't have to rip you a new asshole, because there is already one under your nose posing as a mouth."
Carissa - "Whether or not I'm in a parking space, cyber space or outer space it's all my space."
Nan - "Honey, if I'm not already enthralled, don't even try to impress me."
Ann - "Excuse me, you seem to have mistaken me for your mother. Get a fucking clue."
Arne - "Who the fuck said bitches have no balls?!"
Catherine - "I'd ridicule you, but you probably wouldn't understand half the words. I try not to waste good irony on idiots."
Marian - "Don't fuck with me or I'll knock your dick in your watch-pocket!"
Michelle - "My personal space for most people is about two feet. For you, it's somewhere in West Africa."
Anna - "If you don't like it, don't do it! And stop whining, by the way."
Annie - "I was sick of being left holding everyone else's shit, so I decided to start handing it back."
Nicole - "I feel alone in a crowd, and I'd like to keep it that way."
Meghann - "Exactly which turnip truck did you just fall off?"
Kathy - "I have 3 kids, I don't need a 4th that weighs 200lbs."
Yes! I want to Read about more "Real Life Heartless Bitches"
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